What follows is a list of things no human knows about me. What follows are instances in the great effluvia of creation in which I have found myself directly in control of God's hand, like a golf instructor reaches around his student as their hips swing in unison. What you are about to read is … Continue reading Day Twenty-Seven – We Who Are About to Sigh, Salute You
futurism
Day Twenty-Five – Overture for Three Oboes and an Empty Detergent Bottle
The descent is not so bad as we were told. There is a significant amount of depth to the mental experience of falling from heights above our intended pay range. We have gone beyond the pinnacle of man's real desire and stopped short of our gods' coattails. We did not even reach for them, bless … Continue reading Day Twenty-Five – Overture for Three Oboes and an Empty Detergent Bottle
Day Nineteen – Andrew Lost His Keys While George is Engulfed in Flames
On the third day, the grand and omnipotent entity known as Va'alamyr walked the grounds of his creation. He reveled in the squeakiness of the wet grass beneath his bare feet. He turned his eyes to the blinding sun he had created two days earlier and saw that it was good. The trees were coming … Continue reading Day Nineteen – Andrew Lost His Keys While George is Engulfed in Flames
Day Seventeen – His Most Holy Purveyor of the Remedy to My Madness
"Lift your eyes to the light above you. The cleansing god of ages descends to this mortal coil in fury, and, for our future, he brings tidings of empty joy. This ground upon which we quiver, cowering on bent knee, praying for deliverance is not ours. We came to this land, and toiled in its … Continue reading Day Seventeen – His Most Holy Purveyor of the Remedy to My Madness
Day Sixteen – Numbness in the Toes
Metal men and bloodsucking aliens would be preferable. There are hints of lavender in the sky among the oranges and pinks. Thomas likes lavender. Thomas's sweater is coming unraveled. On this day, Thomas rises from his bed and begins to unravel himself from life, from responsibility, and from the oppressive gaze of the okapi skeleton … Continue reading Day Sixteen – Numbness in the Toes
Day Fifteen – A Public Apology for Events That Occurred on Easter 1993, Wolverhampton, UK
Time is running out and this is the zero hour. For you, the reader, it takes just a few seconds to make a lifetime of difference in the life of someone else, and I am politely asking you, if you are a fan of mad science, cacophony, and imminent destruction, to please donate even a … Continue reading Day Fifteen – A Public Apology for Events That Occurred on Easter 1993, Wolverhampton, UK
Day Thirteen – Twisted Machinations of the 5th Street Mediocre Virtuoso
Nash has just been punched in the face for the first time. The feeling is like falling from the top of a lighthouse, but finding yourself mired in the beam, suspended above the crashing waves in a blinding light, while orbiting the spire of the lighthouse itself at mach speed. His neck snaps back, jostling … Continue reading Day Thirteen – Twisted Machinations of the 5th Street Mediocre Virtuoso
Day Twelve – Marzipan Cottage For Sale
In the early hours of the fifteenth day of August, several men accosted a local doctor on the dirt road, more adequately described as a game trail during that particular season, between Harris township and Bixby's Box. The bandits, four in total, shot Dr. Malcom Renn in the throat and left him for dead in … Continue reading Day Twelve – Marzipan Cottage For Sale
Day Eleven – Supplementary Notes on Gergot Maxim’s 352-Minute Film Entitled “Though Babies Wept and Wretches Bent” As First Orally Related to Kimberly, His Wife, Over an Excessive Third Cup of Lapsang Souchong
Andrew Offal, a businessman of some repute - ill in some circles, vague in others - had excessively high hopes for his eldest daughter. This was evidenced in the fourteen million dollars he had spent on genetic optimization while she floated oblivious to his desires in the womb. Offal had also put at least three … Continue reading Day Eleven – Supplementary Notes on Gergot Maxim’s 352-Minute Film Entitled “Though Babies Wept and Wretches Bent” As First Orally Related to Kimberly, His Wife, Over an Excessive Third Cup of Lapsang Souchong
Day Two – Seguidilla
Extra legs do not make a better dancer. Did you know that dinosaurs are just a figment of your imagination? Do you realize that the Fornax Cluster is just a carefully orchestrated ruse to confuse you into thinking that the Earth is not the center of the universe? The twinkle is a lie. I feel … Continue reading Day Two – Seguidilla
Day One – But First, Hubris
[Revisited and Revised from its original state as published six years ago] My name is Richard. Some people shorten that to Rich, and I happily answer to that. When I was eight years old, I decided I wanted to be called Rich, and that stuck for at least ten years before circumstances led me to … Continue reading Day One – But First, Hubris
Godhood of the Infinitesimally Small 